Happy Halloween!

So, yesterday, Chris told us, "we had cupcakes in class today, but they had candy corns sticking out"

"Well, did you try one?"

"Yes. It was gross, I didn't like it."

He's seen this picture, do you think it had any influence on his opinion of candy corn? We all ate the stuff when we were kids, even though it never tasted that great. It was there, so we ate it. Now my baby won't touch the stuff because he thinks it really comes from the foot of a witch. Is that child abuse?

These really are my two favorite halloween pictures. How sad they have to go away now for another year. We'll leave up our Halloween decorations through the weekend, but then we'll start decorating (inside) for Christmas after that. hee hee, we'll be in the spirit for a long time this year! Mike doesn't know it yet...

Jack-O-Lanterns

FINALLY!

We got a chance to carve our our pumpkins and make them into the much-awaited Jack-o-lanterns!

Don't you just love the bumpy look! Imagine, she's fortunate one, remaining intact, while her friends were altered beyond recognition... (kind of like the token saved turkey at Thanksgiving)


Ahhh, here they are! As I brought them in the house from the front steps, where they have been decorating the neighborhood, he took over. He rolled the biggest one down the hall all the way to the dining room. And yes, he rolled them between all the boxes that remain to be opened (just try to ignore all the house decor for the time being).

As I went to pull the pizza out of the oven for dinner, which took a whole couple of minutes, Chris had already gone to work. He got our his markers and had drawn his favorite pumpkin faces on the soon to be jacks.

So we did what we had to do...used his artwork!

I kept hearing, "ewww, this is gross, it's slimy, ewww". But he forged on. Job to do!


Very proud!

Well, no candles in the house (residual from the "moving experience")...but, birthday candles work in a pinch. As you can see, our little guy did beautiful work! He should be proud!

Favorite Books: Captain Underpants

Chris' favorite book series right now is "Captain Underpants"
For those of you who don't know about Dave Pilkey and his children's books, this is really boy humor for grades 2 thru 4 or so. They use words like, well, underpants.

"Dav Pilkey originally got the idea of Captain Underpants back when he was in the second grade. Pilkey says during an interview:

'I got the idea when I was a second grader at St. John's Lutheran School in Elyria, Ohio. My teacher used the word "underpants" in class one day and everyone started laughing. She got mad and told us that underwear was not funny. We all laughed harder. Usually, when the class cracked up, it was because of something I had said or done. But our teacher had never made everybody laugh so hard before. I realized then that the word "underpants" was a very funny word. On the school bus home that day, I was making up a story about underwear and some younger kids in the seat behind me were laughing so hard, they almost fell on the floor. The next day, while sitting in the hallway — I spent lots of time in the hallway because I often misbehaved in class — I invented a superhero named Captain Underpants.'"

There are 4 books in the set we have, each about 130 pages long. No, you can't just read a few pages, you have to read ALL of them in each sitting. Some of the pages are comic-book style, but they have to look at the pictures to watch the story progress.

(Laughing)...and now I have to wonder what the imagination of these books will trigger in the creative mind of our little guy...

.

Surprises from Gramps & Doc!

It's all in the timing, and since we believe in synchronicity, it all works out!

He LOVES his new backpack! Asks to use it for school every day, especially the lunch box that attaches. He decided last weekend that he wants to be a "lunchbox kid". Prior to that, he was buying lunch at school every day. So, I pulled out the lunchbox we used for him in the van whenever we went on outings or trips.

Last Friday afternoon he said, with a sad tone in his voice, "Mommy, everyday when Ms. Barrett calls for all the lunchbox kids to line up, I can never get in that line."

"Well, do you want to?"

"Yes! Because everyday I have to go get in the other line, then I have to go buy my food, decide what I want, and wait in another line. I never get to just go in and eat my food."

All week: he's Lunch Box Boy. And, unknowingly, Gramps and Doc sent him the perfect lunchbox and backpack that arrived the middle of this week, which he's really enjoying, thanks!!! He is also loving the books, especially the one about the toll bridge troll. :) One of our favorite parts of the day is at night when we get to read stories.

Boxes on the stoop. "Hey, they say 'Chris', That's MY name! Are they for me?"



The best part of presents is the packaging. Next thing I knew, he had laid the bubble plastic on the floor and was dancing and jumping on it. What fun!

First time tying own shoes!

October 26, 2008

Love those hand-me-downs! We wouldn't be the people we are without them, and that is the honest-to-God truth!

So, he has a lot of shoes and boots now, some of them a little big. He decided to wear these shoes, which are the tie up version.

Of course, we can't have Mom help us. Don't need instructions or assistance on how to tie a shoe, even though he's never done it before. So, he tied his own, and he wore them this way all day (not a school day!). I detect a little determination in his spirit, just hope it will always serve him well. In the meantime, he wins for best dressed and most determined.

It's a little hard to see, but I love the way he figured to "tie" them around the other laces:

Fall Festival at the Elementary School

Fall Festival (since all the public schools are forbidden to mention specific HOLIDAYS -- how stupid is this country getting, "for real"), aka, pre-halloween party. Playing with his buddy, Julian:

Cookie Monster makes a welcomed appearance

Alien Target Shooting


Pumpkin bowling (which is tricky, since the "ball" is never round! Try that after a couple drinks)


The local fire department is very patient, answering a lot of questions, letting the kids get a hands-on experience



Muscle machine


Pumpkin bean bags

Another Tooth!

October 23, 2008

These teeth are just coming out one after another, here's #5, at age 5 1/2! The other front tooth is still like a hinge, while his first adult tooth is already half way thru.



Good thing the Tooth Fairy knows where to find him!

How many of you are there?

Christopher:

HowManyOfMe.com

There are 1,776 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

Michael:

HowManyOfMe.com

There are 4,519 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

Virginia

HowManyOfMe.com

There are 736 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

I know, something about "need a hobby"...

Life of the World * Vita Mundi

Picture from Mom's bedroom, been there since before any of us. It was in a wooden frame with no glass on the front. Perhaps the glass broke one year or maybe it never had one. The darker colors and background show how it has aged over the years.


Another version found on the internet. The background seems to be more blue than Mom's. Makes me appreciate how much she really liked her picture to keep it up on her wall all these years, positioned in a place that she could see it every time she was laying in her bed.

"More people have seen the paintings of Margaret Mary Nealis than are aware of the identity of the artist who produced them. A Religious of the Sacred Heart, for four decades Mother Nealis painted religious subjects in and around Montreal. Her output was prodigious and she fulfilled many major commissions. Her paintings were reproduced in large quantities and distributed world-wide through the efforts of the Montreal commercial photographer, J.F.Topp."

Second reference:
"Mother Margaret Mary Nealis painted "Vita Mundi" around 1932. One day she answered the doorbell at the Montreal convent and found a young mother with two small children asking for help. She was so taken with the beauty of the youngest child that she quickly sketched him and this sketch became the basis for her painting."

Mom's story:

She had this picture in her bedroom since any of us can remember. It was in her first room at the house, and was moved to her last one. When she passed on July 9th last year, she was alone in the house with my two young nephews. My sister had brought them over, as she always did, and they laid down on the sofas to go back to sleep until they were ready to wake up. The routine was that my sister would call Mom later to see if she needed anything, and by then, everyone was awake, breakfasts over, and the day started.

On this particular day, everything changed. The boys, who were almost 5 and 8, had gone into Mom's room and found her laying down, as if she were sleeping. She never responded to them, so they thought she really was sleeping. They tried talking to her a few times for the several hours they were there with her. The youngest one went back in later to ask Mom if he could have some banana bread. At was this point, he told his mother later that night, that he saw a little boy in the room with Mom. The boy was dressed in white, "kind of floated" in such a way he didn't see any feet on him, and it was not clear about any other specifics. The next time they came to the house, my sister took him back into the room and asked him if he saw the little boy again. He looked all around and when he got to this picture on the wall, where it was hanging to the right of the door as you enter the bedroom, he told his mother that "it's him!"

Later, when I talked to a spiritual life coach that I have known and done work with for years, I asked him about the figure that my young nephew saw. Onada told me that "it was the father figure. He was with her for about a 7 day period before she transitioned, to help her with the transition." He indicated that Mom knew about 48 hours before she passed that this was going to be her time. When I asked him about why she didn't call any of us to say goodbye, he said that when she realized what was happening, she turned inwards and talked to God. Given her strong spiritual beliefs, that is something I can see her doing. In recounting how Mom spent her last few days, it was told by several that "she said she didn't feel good and she was just going to go lay down." And that is pretty much how she spent most of her last two days, resting but not sleeping much.

Upon thinking about it later, it is probably more true that she did say goodbye to each of us in her own way. She knew she didn't feel good, and while she may not have known the exact moment her spirit was going to take the journey, she was prepared to go.

So here we have this picture as a reminder of the link between the spirit world and that in which we live every day. What is real and what is not?

More on the "messages" that Mom has been sending to each of us later. They are pretty special, showing up at the oddest of moments!

Family Surprises!

NOW marks 1 year, 3 months and 11 days since my Mom departed this world, or 469 days, or ~ 675,360 minutes.

No, it's not any easier. Figuring out how to Deal with the Reality is getting easier. Either way, I miss my Mom.

This weekend was a milestone weekend for me and my brothers and sisters. And their families as well, of course. Change affects everyone, whether we like it or not.

When change happens in a large family, it may be virtually impossible to find a consensus on all counts, for all projects, deadlines or not. Regardless, it is important to maintain a focus. For me, my main objective is to be the best Mom, wife, friend, sister and aunt I can be, and to find happiness in life in the process. It’s as simple as that.

So, this weekend we all agreed that we would finish the final project that has been lingering, which is to figure out who gets what and have those things relocated to their new homes. Yes, there is emotion involved, as well as 10 different opinions on how best to proceed. Further, with each and every item that is moved or removed, there is a tug at the emotional string for each of us. It is involuntary, even when we understand the emotions and logic around the activities. There are the comments about no one wanting to seem greedy...but we must remember that THIS is what Mom wanted!!! She SAID so, on numerous occasions. For those who were listening, we all heard the same thing.

For outsiders looking in, it may not seem like much, and it may seem ridiculous that “Patsy’s kids” are having such a hard time. Well, I can tell you, it’s just not that simple. The situation has many layers and levels. And surprises, be it in how someone reacts, or a memory that was invoked along the way, or in contemplating the future without Mom sitting in her living room.

For me, one of the hardest parts was to sort through her clothes. What do you do with someone's clothes when they no longer need them? One of my sisters and I want to cut up a few pieces to make something with them, maybe a few quilts, maybe pillow cases, maybe things we haven't thought of yet. Ordinarily I'd dump a pile of clothes on the floor to help sort them, but I couldn't bring myself to put even one of her things on the floor. I had it all on the back and seat of the sofa. It was then that I realized how much all her clothes together resembled a flower garden! A few items with stripes, random patterns, or t-shirts with their own designs, but more than 75% of her garments were flowers, the majority being roses.

She loved her roses!
Keith planted a rose memorial in her front yard earlier this year, they are beautiful! See the picture further down below.

Perhaps second hardest was to actually take things through the door, meaning that this really was a “final” act of "life as we know it at Mom’s house". After this weekend, it will be Keith and Della’s house, where they live with their own families. It already is and has been, without a doubt, but up until this weekend, the other 8 of us were involved. Now, they can move forward with flexibility and no strings from the outside. It’s a nice INDEPENDENT feeling to be able to direct a project without interference, well intended or not. It’s nice to be able to ask for help on a project and know the other person can say yes or no, but that’s where it ends. Either they will help you and you tell them what you want, or they say no and the conversation is over. There will no longer be a situation of trying to get 10 people to agree on each and every decision. FREEDOM! INDEPENDENCE! It’s a great thing!

So, some of us came together, we all had our opportunities to do the last of what each of us needed to do. It went smoothly and it went peacefully, for all who chose to participate.

There was laughing, crying, and joking, and the making of new memories. Definitely a step forward for the first time (in my opinion) in the past 15 months. Thank goodness!

Joking:
James to Elaina: “Hey, don’t you have your driver’s permit now?”
Elaina: “Yes, I do!”
James: “Oh, well then that explains why, on my way down this morning, that all those people were standing in the middle of the road instead of on the sidewalk.”
Elaina: “You think you are funny!”

How we acquire so much refrigerator art:
Tyler to me: “Aunt Vah-gin-ya, can I have some paper to draw some pictures?”
Me: “Yes, here you go.”
Tyler: “Thanks, what do you want me to draw for you?”
Me: “Oh, I like a flower garden, with all colors of flowers.”
Tyler: “Okay! What colors?”
Me: “green, purple, red, blue, yellow, orange, pink”
Tyler, 30 minutes later: “Okay, is this what you like?”
Me: “You did a fantastic job.”
Tyler: SMILING very proudly!

Realty sinking in:
One of us: “Wow, this is really hard.”
Someone else: “It’s not easy for any of us. I know it’s not easy for me.”
Another: “But it has to be done, and it’s what Mom wanted us to do. It’s going to be okay.”

And it is.

Here are some pics from the weekend:
Upon arriving to Down County, we went in search of Grandma. She wasn’t home from her dinner date yet, so we looked around at the haunted hayride decorations. Looks like everyone will be having lots of fun scaring people next weekend!





We decided to wait by sitting in the dark on the swinging bench. Before us was a full and orange harvest moon, very nice indeed, and just coming over the treeline across the street. Unfortunately, our camera isn’t that great, so this is as clear as it gets. Color is close, though.




Grandma and Sheryl arrived shortly after that, and we had a short but fun visit. It's been over a year since our last visit.


For our entire trip from NM to VA and now to MD, the one thing he’s been waiting so patiently for is to get to play with his cousins. He was so excited to be there, and they all played hard, like boys like to do. Bikes, football throwing, horseshoes, hide and go seek, scooter, running, coloring, drawing, tv and movies, video games, eating, repeat!




















Ahhh, time for the outside haircut. Yes, Patrick actually asked to have his hair cut. Good thing he has such a nice sister!


At one point, I found myself shifting small items from one box into another. Jinxie decided that HE needed to plant his bottom in the same box at the same time. And, so he did. And so I kept adding my items to the box, which took me about 20 minutes as I was doing something else in the process. He finally decided he had gotten covered enough and finally got out. He is one of those bag kitties, or coat kitties, or box kitties, or just climb on whatever is around to catch and eat the moths kitties. He's a lot of fun!

And here we have Permit Girl. Watch out on the sidewalks, so I hear! Oh, gosh, her mother looks terrified! I did witness them both return to the house in one piece, thank goodness!