How it is

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
--Anais Nin

This has never been truer than now.

One of my all-time favorite quotes, because it speaks the truth like nothing else I've ever known.

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...and then I felt the urge to check something on Anais Nin, who is an amazing author, and found another of her quotes that is equally amazing and true:

"Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of withering, of tarnishing."

so the answer is, if you love something or someone, you need to do things to take care of that love